03 June, 2007

Fixing a hole where the Rift gets in

More information about the conclusion to the present series of Dr Who has emerged.

It appears that just before Martha is taken hostage by a mysterious alien race, she accidentally destroys half of the TARDIS console in frustration at the Doctor's reticence. In response the Doctor offers up a protracted monologue wherein he finally, finally, says what he really feels about his companion.

"Martha my dear," he begins, "though I spend my days in conversation - please, remember me." Absent-mindedly wandering around the wrecked console room, he continues plaintively, "Martha my love - don't forget me." He pauses, half-staring into space. "Martha...my dear."

Noticing his companion is uncomfortably casting her eyes to the floor, the Doctor instantly switches from contemplation to aggression. "Hold your head up you silly girl," he snaps, gesturing to the damage all around them, "look what you've done!" Martha begins to sob, but the Doctor presses on. "When you find yourself in the thick of it," he barks, "help yourself to a bit of what is all around you - silly girl!"

Noticing that Martha is now openly weeping, the Doctor's mood changes again. "Take a good look around you," he orders. "Take a good look!" Martha follows the Doctor's instructions, only to see that her mentor is smiling broadly. "You're bound to see," he murmurs, "that you and me were meant to be for each other - silly girl!"

Hugging his companion affectionately, the Doctor then confides: "Martha my dear, you have always been my inspiration - please, be good to me." Walking her gently towards the TARDIS exit, he concludes wistfully, "Martha my love. Don't forget me. Martha my dear."

At which point he kicks her out the door and into the arms of a alien ship bound for a six-month residential course at a nearby drama school.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

What the fuck are you talking about?

Ian Jones said...

Check out The Beatles' White Album.